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Blues Situation

by Tim Birchard

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1.
Sunset Blues 10:06
In all my life I've never had it so good One day the sun's gonna set and I'll have to say goodbye Like we always knew we would Loving you Baby Makes my heart want to explode Sometimes it feels so good it hurts It's a loving pain like I've never known There's so much beauty here Every breath breaks my heart open wide Baby, don't just stand there looking beautiful Why don't you come inside
2.
Dangerous 04:19
You know I've been around the block A time or two I've made my fair share of mistakes I thought I kind of Understood the rules Where a heart can bend And where it breaks There's a spark in her eye A smile on her face Makes my heart race There's a spark in her eye A smile on her lips Her hands are on her hips And she's dangerous In stormy seas The blackened sky I thank To see her smile I would happily walk the plank There's a spark in her eye A smile on her face Makes my heart race There's a spark in her eye A smile on her lips Her hands are on her hips And she's dangerous
3.
Made me a spreadsheet Kept all my receipts But now my defeat Feels pretty much complete He takes off his glasses Sets them down on the table Gathers his thoughts As best as he is able "Was it love that you were thinking of?" But before I can speak He says, "Looks like our time is up now Guess I'll see you next week" He says, "Your donations Were not tax deductible No refunds for lack of judgment Or for the gullible" "You spent your life at the wishing well If I understand correctly You threw away everything" Then he asked me directly "Was it love that you were thinking of?" But before I can speak He says, "Looks like our time is up now Guess I'll see you next week" I paid good money Waited so long to see Now I'm standing empty-handed, feeling crash-landed Guess the joke's on me The wishing well takes Til there's nothing left to give Bucket hits bottom, smoke em if ya got em Yeah, what a way to live "Was it love that you were thinking of?" But before I can speak He says, "Looks like our time is up now Guess I'll see you next week" Oh, you poor fool He takes off his glasses Sets them down on the table Gathers his thoughts As best as he is able "Your donations Were not tax deductible No refunds for lack of judgment Or for the gullible" "Was it love that you were thinking of?" But before I can speak He says, "Looks like our time is up now Guess I'll see you next week"
4.
Did you bring the sunshine When you stepped off the bus? Did you bring the moonshine Will you share with the rest of us? Do you make the clouds roll? I look into your laughing eyes We're all in trouble now
5.
Five Bullets 04:51
Got five bullets in my six gun I've always wanted to visit Russia See the places of which Tolstoy spoke But how it's looking now, probably never will They'd just execute me, bury me up on the hill Got five bullets in my six gun I've always wanted to visit Cuba See the places of which Hemingway spoke But how it's looking now, I wouldn't make it one day Lock me up at Gitmo, throw the key away Got five bullets in my six gun I've always wanted to visit the USA See the places of which Einstein spoke But that's just a bunch of pipe dream jive Beware the public schools if you wanna get out alive Got five bullets in my six gun Got five bullets in my six gun Against an army of a million Like one tiny, angry soul Trying to question the Church Kinda seems like the world Has gotten faster and louder I was praying for a refund Ended up in a lurch Got five bullets in my six gun I've always wanted to visit Russia See the places of which Tolstoy spoke I've always wanted to visit Cuba See the places of which Hemingway spoke I've always wanted to visit the USA See the places of which Einstein spoke But how it's looking now, probably never will They'd just execute me, bury me up on the hill
6.
I'm headed to New Braunfels Sunset in New Braunfels Gonna keep me nice and warm I'm headed to New Braunfels Sunset in New Braunfels Gonna get me through this storm Coffee shop refuge From the pinball traffic deluge 18-wheeler jackknife Early end to this life Freezing rain is falling from the sky Sheets of ice on the ground Sound of cracking, trees collapsing My heart breaking the only sound Darkness on the city Power's out and it ain't pretty Stay at home And try to stay warm Sitting by the fire Another whiskey liar Just gotta survive This one last storm Heaven's gonna wreck us In the heart of Texas Hearts are breaking In the heart of Texas Ain't nobody going out tonight Gotta keep the fire burning If you wanna live Through the night
7.
The monkeys have escaped I read it in the paper today What you gonna do? They were set free by the clowns They're gonna burn the whole thing down What you gonna do? Tio Carlos has a lift Tio Carlos has a gift He can fix your shift You better call Carlos Locusts ate the crops No good to call the cops What you gonna do? On the brink of nuclear war Settling the score What you gonna do? Tio Carlos has a lift Tio Carlos has a gift He can fix your shift You better call Carlos In a world of uncertainty It's nice to know he's there for me I'm dialing the number To get Carlos on the phone Explain to him my problems He can get me on the road Tio Carlos has a lift Tio Carlos has a gift He can fix your shift You better call Carlos Truck ain't going much He can fix your clutch He's got the magic touch The monkeys have escaped I read it in the paper today What you gonna do? They were set free by the clowns They're gonna burn the whole thing down What you gonna do?
8.
This could be my breakout role My first-class ticket out of this hole When you made your reservation You didn't realize History was being made Before your very eyes This could be my breakout role My first-class ticket out of this hole My name is Gregory Shall we start with some drinks? You can count on me, Sir With smile and a wink Pitcher of water at your elbow... again Is everything tasting delicious? I ask you... again Interrupting your conversation to check on things... again Gauging your reaction of satisfaction... my friend In my white shirt and black bow tie Sleeves rolled up to the elbow My flawless diction My hair perfectly coiffed Superb in my humility Superb in my humility! This could be my breakout role My first-class ticket out of this hole My name is Gregory Shall we start with some drinks? You can count on me, Ma'am With smile and a wink My name is Gregory Your new best friend You can tell me anything I'm with you to the end Pitcher of water at your elbow... again Is everything tasting delicious? I ask you... again Interrupting your conversation to check on things... again Gauging your reaction of satisfaction... my friend Perhaps one day Broadway, MacBeth Leave my adoring fans Gasping for breath A mountain of roses Landing at my feet Standing ovation And my victory is complete I'm Gregory The Magnificent Waiter I have infiltrated the wait staff Now the place is mine I float across the floor All eyes are on me as they dine Graciously I endure With deportment so divine My delivery impeccable As I pour the glass of wine That guy in the sport coat Is he on to me? Where did he get that tie? Can't he see? Ill be all the more obsequious They'll fall for me delirious They condescend and order large But I'm Gregory and I'm in charge Pitcher of water at your elbow... again Is everything tasting delicious? I ask you... again I'm Gregory The Magnificent Waiter
9.
Her heart was tired From smiling all the time One day she snapped She was running out of time She used to be such a nice girl She used to be such a nice lady His heart was tired Pretending every day I'm perfectly harmless You can trust me when I say He used to be such a nice boy He used to be such a nice guy From the darkness of the deep Something floats to the surface If you're not smiling I tend to get real nervous When the well runs dry Always grinning For self preservation Total compliance With no reservation He used to be such a nice boy He used to be such a nice guy From the darkness of the deep Something floats to the surface If you're not smiling I tend to get real nervous When the well runs dry Cannot let them know What you've been thinking lately Just nod and smile Until you can get to safety Behind closed doors Her heart was tired From smiling all the time One day she snapped She ran out of time She used to be such a nice girl She used to be such a nice lady His heart was tired Pretending every day I'm perfectly harmless You can trust me when I say He used to be such a nice boy He used to be such a nice guy You can hear them say He used to be such a nice guy Hear them saying See them thinking When the well runs dry

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released March 12, 2023

Cover photography: Julia Giacomini on Unsplash. Porto Alegre, Brazil.

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